The Perfect Day
So on wednesday I legit had the perfect day lol exams were over and I only spend about 6 minutes of it out of my bed haha. My awakening thoughts were 'omg idec what time it is; being unburdened of exams I had the best sleep ever'. YES I THINK IN SEMI COLONS OKAY DONT JUDGE me bc SOME DAY I will be ((omg))
all that you want,
and gather myself 2geth x
bc you keep me from falling apart;
All my lyf,
I be avec 4 e v
to get u thro the day
and make everything okai x o x
hahaha I forgot I used to do this!! Love this bc I never see it coming but then the lyrics just materialise and spring but omg beaut song <3 so so beaut omg I love leona lewis this song is more beautiful than Leona's alliterative name lol dreamed she was our lodger but never saw her bc always performing haha
On Friday I had my clarinet lesson and saw Emma whilst walking home and she kind of coerced me to still attend french lessons next term because one cannot leave her with the unfathomable child that is Joel lol. However, I was hoping to still go until summer but I checked online and I'm no longer timetabled for it !!! :(( Im actually so sorry but if you're reading this I want you to know Im not betraying you bc Id go if I could bc will be burdened by the immorality the day it happens :'(
Sadly, I cannot quite recall what I dreamed of but most likely there was an oriental motif bc idk y but for the past month or so EVERY NIGHT I've been dreaming about being in a beautiful foreign country and travelling and I just hope some day I will be able to revisit these places Ive dreamed of WAIT JUTS RECALLED!!! Okay so it was just me and summer and the asian heat was satanic but her white radiance prevailed through this pervading incandescent aflame. Though for once I wished not for tenebrosity Thus, I decided to take some photographs with her but deleted them bc too ugly. Subsequently, I decided to eternalise snapshots of her from a distance on her own lying amid the tall slender grass and my smile slowly faltered as I thought of her mother: one of her paws was slightly further forward than the other and her face looked thinner and more morose and Idk if this was just an elderly summer perhaps?? But truthfully the older she becomes the more she seems to resemble the snowsephine; the older I become the more I can overlook these superficial characteristics. But by choice - conscious or subsoncious - or by obliviousness???
Circulating though my cognitive processes were the vocals of the enigmatic duo 'Oh Wonder' thus I had to satiate this endless circulation was 9am thus Id only had 7 hours of sleep (bc was up until about 2am watching American Horror Story) but despite this I felt more rested than any sleep Id ever slept. So after listening to Oh Wonder on spotify I couldn't stop thinking about AHS thus watched 2 episodes and then by 1pm I was v thirsty and needed to revoke my teeth of the entrapment of retainers thus brushed my teeth, drank some lemon water and consumed toast but the thoughts were haunting me perpetually thus I returned to this beautiful psychodynamic thriller and within 24 hours of starting it I had watched all twelve episodes of the first season. What made this first season beautiful for me was although i do love to watch the malevolent dissolution of relationships, it was equally beautiful seeing people rekindle during such times of such adversity and you see yourself in their malevolence; thus in spite of the malice you wish only for resolution.
In the evening there was a program on about Homosexuality and Transgenderism in Iranian people and when it finished my mother mentioned this for the first time since my last post
So she was like: have you told your dad about you??????????????????????????????
I could Identify the contextually dependent allusion; I told her no and she was like 'so are you sure about it', probably due to my somewhat equivocal response of 'perhaps' when she asked me lol, so I was like 'yes'. She asked how long Id known and I said a few years, since I was 14 I guess and she was v kind and said my dad will be fine with it so I shouldn't worry about his reaction, but she said I can talk to her about it if I want :3 so I'm thinking I might ask her about how I should tell him bc always thought I don't really need to but I kind of want to now idk
Also don't mock me but v funny thing happened - mother legit asked if I was in a relationship hahahahahaha l m a o l ofc I just lightly laughed and said 'no haha' but inside my ribcages were dissolving with laughter at this as my haw was evolving into an interspersion of dolphin squeals and insatiable cries :')
Also finished season 2 of American Horror Story at 1am last night and and o h m y g o d I cannot explain my feelings but I think its better than breaking bad and I feel so bad but the character development!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The surreal reality of the gothic supernatural <3 although I agree with georgerai the alien subplot was completely futile. So I was up until about 2 trying to fathom what had happened lol but it was so good and I cried throughout the whole final episode but it was so happy Although in breaking bad you see this inextricable irrevocable moral decent, and for me I was so oblivious to what he'd become I loved him until the end when I know I should have stopped a long time ago (beautiful exemplification of my grotesqueness lol) but then the sad thing is you realise this character progression was merely superficial compared to when you realise that perhaps all along he had a predisposition for this inherent malevolence. Conversely, in the asylum the character roles and dynamics can just be subverted in a second and you can go from wanting to murder these characters to crying over their demise
ALSO thank you georgerai you may have unfavourited my tweet about it but I owe you for telling me to watch this so guess we're even lol bc it was SO inspirational!!!! Lana (Del Rey) Winters is actually my idol I want to be like her lol she looks like lana del rey haha but omg I actually want to become a journalist now and go to Russia and be imprisoned for my homosexuality and escape and expose the abhorrence and rise the revolution and disperse all the perfumes of arabia to diffuse the injustice creating perpetual societal change thereby revoking the tyrannical reign and subsequently write some novels and win a Pulitzer prize and move to new york and grow calloused with the burden of this mortal coil and sardonic with the power of fame, ultimately avenging the snowsephine and develop the silky smooth vocals of the apathetic avenger but live the life of a regretful wingless mockingbird.
okay so word of the blog: tenebrosity
- the ominous quality of being dark or shadowy -
all that you want,
and gather myself 2geth x
bc you keep me from falling apart;
All my lyf,
I be avec 4 e v
to get u thro the day
and make everything okai x o x
hahaha I forgot I used to do this!! Love this bc I never see it coming but then the lyrics just materialise and spring but omg beaut song <3 so so beaut omg I love leona lewis this song is more beautiful than Leona's alliterative name lol dreamed she was our lodger but never saw her bc always performing haha
On Friday I had my clarinet lesson and saw Emma whilst walking home and she kind of coerced me to still attend french lessons next term because one cannot leave her with the unfathomable child that is Joel lol. However, I was hoping to still go until summer but I checked online and I'm no longer timetabled for it !!! :(( Im actually so sorry but if you're reading this I want you to know Im not betraying you bc Id go if I could bc will be burdened by the immorality the day it happens :'(
Sadly, I cannot quite recall what I dreamed of but most likely there was an oriental motif bc idk y but for the past month or so EVERY NIGHT I've been dreaming about being in a beautiful foreign country and travelling and I just hope some day I will be able to revisit these places Ive dreamed of WAIT JUTS RECALLED!!! Okay so it was just me and summer and the asian heat was satanic but her white radiance prevailed through this pervading incandescent aflame. Though for once I wished not for tenebrosity Thus, I decided to take some photographs with her but deleted them bc too ugly. Subsequently, I decided to eternalise snapshots of her from a distance on her own lying amid the tall slender grass and my smile slowly faltered as I thought of her mother: one of her paws was slightly further forward than the other and her face looked thinner and more morose and Idk if this was just an elderly summer perhaps?? But truthfully the older she becomes the more she seems to resemble the snowsephine; the older I become the more I can overlook these superficial characteristics. But by choice - conscious or subsoncious - or by obliviousness???
Circulating though my cognitive processes were the vocals of the enigmatic duo 'Oh Wonder' thus I had to satiate this endless circulation was 9am thus Id only had 7 hours of sleep (bc was up until about 2am watching American Horror Story) but despite this I felt more rested than any sleep Id ever slept. So after listening to Oh Wonder on spotify I couldn't stop thinking about AHS thus watched 2 episodes and then by 1pm I was v thirsty and needed to revoke my teeth of the entrapment of retainers thus brushed my teeth, drank some lemon water and consumed toast but the thoughts were haunting me perpetually thus I returned to this beautiful psychodynamic thriller and within 24 hours of starting it I had watched all twelve episodes of the first season. What made this first season beautiful for me was although i do love to watch the malevolent dissolution of relationships, it was equally beautiful seeing people rekindle during such times of such adversity and you see yourself in their malevolence; thus in spite of the malice you wish only for resolution.
In the evening there was a program on about Homosexuality and Transgenderism in Iranian people and when it finished my mother mentioned this for the first time since my last post
So she was like: have you told your dad about you??????????????????????????????
I could Identify the contextually dependent allusion; I told her no and she was like 'so are you sure about it', probably due to my somewhat equivocal response of 'perhaps' when she asked me lol, so I was like 'yes'. She asked how long Id known and I said a few years, since I was 14 I guess and she was v kind and said my dad will be fine with it so I shouldn't worry about his reaction, but she said I can talk to her about it if I want :3 so I'm thinking I might ask her about how I should tell him bc always thought I don't really need to but I kind of want to now idk
Also don't mock me but v funny thing happened - mother legit asked if I was in a relationship hahahahahaha l m a o l ofc I just lightly laughed and said 'no haha' but inside my ribcages were dissolving with laughter at this as my haw was evolving into an interspersion of dolphin squeals and insatiable cries :')
Also finished season 2 of American Horror Story at 1am last night and and o h m y g o d I cannot explain my feelings but I think its better than breaking bad and I feel so bad but the character development!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The surreal reality of the gothic supernatural <3 although I agree with georgerai the alien subplot was completely futile. So I was up until about 2 trying to fathom what had happened lol but it was so good and I cried throughout the whole final episode but it was so happy Although in breaking bad you see this inextricable irrevocable moral decent, and for me I was so oblivious to what he'd become I loved him until the end when I know I should have stopped a long time ago (beautiful exemplification of my grotesqueness lol) but then the sad thing is you realise this character progression was merely superficial compared to when you realise that perhaps all along he had a predisposition for this inherent malevolence. Conversely, in the asylum the character roles and dynamics can just be subverted in a second and you can go from wanting to murder these characters to crying over their demise
ALSO thank you georgerai you may have unfavourited my tweet about it but I owe you for telling me to watch this so guess we're even lol bc it was SO inspirational!!!! Lana (Del Rey) Winters is actually my idol I want to be like her lol she looks like lana del rey haha but omg I actually want to become a journalist now and go to Russia and be imprisoned for my homosexuality and escape and expose the abhorrence and rise the revolution and disperse all the perfumes of arabia to diffuse the injustice creating perpetual societal change thereby revoking the tyrannical reign and subsequently write some novels and win a Pulitzer prize and move to new york and grow calloused with the burden of this mortal coil and sardonic with the power of fame, ultimately avenging the snowsephine and develop the silky smooth vocals of the apathetic avenger but live the life of a regretful wingless mockingbird.
okay so word of the blog: tenebrosity
- the ominous quality of being dark or shadowy -
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