Unfaithful
All my life Ive just pushed everyone away who's ever tried to get close to me but i finally found someone who I was unafraid to love but I killed him idk why I do this maybe it was losing snowsephine maybe it was bc the only people Id ever had feelings for betrayed me maybe I have reactive attachment disorder i dont think ill ever know but what i do know is in trying to pursue an altruistic love, I became consumed by hedonism, hypocrisy, malevolence, mendacity and manipulation. I became everything I feared in humanity. If youve been with me for the past couple of years you will have followed me on a journey of psychological torment as I suffered the hands of abuse and betrayal and many other things that youll never know bc I vow to take them to my grave but now everything I condem about human nature, its what Ive become. Literally the most beautiful boy I had ever seen trusted me and I betrayed him. So many times. So many nights I kiss blurry faced guys and lesbians and awake...